Adventure #78: KJ Is On A Mission
Dear You,
This was written on September 10th, around 9:30 P.M. It's being posted on the following morning, at around 5:00 A.M. because on September 10th, around 9:30 P.M., my scanner decided, "Hey, you're not paying me or anything, so why should I scan?" Thankfully, by 5:00 A.M. the following morning, it had come to its senses.
Yesterday, I was bloghopping and just HAD to sign up to do Mission: Collage, the first ever Land of Lost Luggage swap -- & also MY first ever official group swap.
It's explained here, but basically every dayish, Julie of The Land of Luggage is explaining three techniques from a book by Sally Jean Alexander and you use those techniques, in order, in your collage. There are 18 techniques in all. This is sort of scary to me, because I'm using a 5" X 7" gallery wrapped canvas and here's what it looks like at this point in time:
(Pssst: Up close & in person, it's much prettier: the colors are more vivid, the papers are sparkly, the metallic paint is shimmery and any little unattractive specks and blechs you see in this picture aren't actually present and accounted for -- they were inherited from my in-much-need-of-a-wipe-down scanner during the scan.)
Y'all!
So far that's only THREE techniques (Paint, Paper, & Ink).
I still have FIFTEEN more techniques to fit in on that teeny tiny canvas. Yipes! This is definitely looking like Mission: Impossible, but I'm excited to do the next three techniques, and the three after that, and the three after that. It's going to take some creativity, but I'm determined that it can be done.
I'm feeling a little I-messed-up already, because one of the later techniques is apparently Write and I already Wrote with my Ink. Is that cheating? Oh, well -- the most exciting thing about this "mission" is my decision as I was starting to just Go With It and not worry about Being Perfect or even Good. Just to have fun. And fun I'm having!
I was so excited about getting started on this today, last night, I dreamt about it.
In my dream, I was at some Etsy convention in Las Vegas and good grief there were some WILD Etsyians in attendance. I kept saying, "Calm down, y'all, we're gonna get arrested" -- they were that WILD. Anyway, I got a phone call to come play golf with the girls from the Mission: Collage swap (and Dave Coulier -- do not ask, I haven't even watched any Full House reruns or anything lately so I cannot explain it -- who kept hitting the balls at me and who apparently is almost fifty -- I didn't know that (until I Googled to make sure I was spelling his last name correctly.)).
Anyway, I leave you with this neat-o trick I learned today: If you've ordered a package that's going to be delivered UPS and you have a tracking number, you don't have to go to the UPS site, you can just go to Google and type in said tracking number and hit search -- and it'll take you right to the page with your info. I don't know if it necessarily saves any time or steps, but it's still cool!
And another neat-o trick I learned is how (for you single girls) to meet two friendly, good-looking guys in one day.
It goes something like this: Look a total mess and do nothing grooming-wise other than brushing your teeth because you're not going anywhere and will just be home working all day. Ooh, and wear velvet pajama bottoms from two years ago that are kind of too tight because it's laundry day and all of your other "uniforms" (which in my case are paint-splattered track pants and paint-splattered t-shirts) are dirty. Whatever you do, don't do anything about your bedhead, except maybe to pin your bangs up in a way that looks like a science experiment gone awry. Expect a package that's going to be delivered via UPS and another that's going to be delivered via USPS. And just wait. Because your normal mail-lady will have a substitute that day and it will be a friendly, good-looking guy who shows up at your door with your package to witness you looking like the polar opposite of Miss America on pageant night. And then, don't learn your lesson. Stay exactly how you are. In fact, allow your appearance to deteriorate throughout the day, so that when the UPS truck pulls up into the driveway at 5:00 p.m. -- it won't be the regular way-older-than-you-and-married UPS driver whom you've known since you were twelve -- but surprise, another substitute! Another friendly, good-looking guy substitute! Don't bother signing up for eHarmony, ladies, -- just follow the above outlined steps. Or maybe that will technique will not work for you. Maybe you will have to be me to work THAT magic.
And I still haven't brushed my hair or put on lipstick, but I'm not expecting anymore packages, so I think I'm safe for the evening.
Sincerely,
KJ
